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Title: EXHAUSTED
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Blog Entry: DEAR SIS MONA (YOUR CHOICE), IT WAS REALLY GOOD HEARING FROM YOU. I WISH I COULD ADEQUATELY DESCRIBE HOW I'M FEELING BUT I'LL JUST GO WITH TOTALLY EXHAUSTED AND HAVING EXCRUCIATING PAIN ALL OVER MY BODY. I LITERALLY FEEL AS IF I'M LOSING MY MIND FROM THE PAIN AND AS SOME DOCTORS HAVE SAID, WHEN I NOW FREELY ADMIT TO THE PAIN THEY KNOW I MUST BE FEELING, THEY KNOW THAT MY BODY IS NOW EXTREMELY EXTRA WEAK. I HAVE NO PROBLEM AT ALL IN SHARING MY HEALTH PROBLEMS WITH YOU. BECAUSE THEY ARE MANY, I WILL TRY NOT TO OVERWHELM U WITH ALL. AND THANKYOU FOR YOUR CONCERN AND INTEREST AND MOST DEFINATELY YOUR PRAYERS. WITHOUT ANY DOUBTS, I CAN TELL U THAT I'M ALIVE BECAUSE OF PRAYERS. MY HEALTH IS SO COMPLICATED THAT ITS DIFFICULT TO HELP ME. I BEGAN GETTING ILL FROM I WAS A CHILD. I WAS TOLD I WOULDNT MAKE IT PAST AGE 16. WAS TOLD I WOULDNT BE ABLE TO UNDERSTAND ANYTHING MUCH. WHEN I WAS 16, I WAS GIVEN A FEW MONTHS TO LIVE. AT THAT TIME I HAD SEVERE JOINT PAIN WHICH TOOK A WHILE TO SORT OUT THE DIAGNOSIS. I WASNT HOME AT THE TIME AND I DECIDED IF I WAS GOING TO DIE SOON, I WANTED TO BE WITH MY PARENTS SO I WENT HOME. FUNNY ENOUGH, ALTHOUGH I LOOKED DEATHLY ILL, I DIDNT SAY ANYTHING ABOUT WHAT THE DOCTOR SAID. ONE DAY I REALIZED I HAD PASSED THE TIME THAT THE DOCTOR SAID I WOULDNT LIVE AND THAT'S WHEN I TOLD MY PARENTS WHAT THE DOCTOR HAD SAID. ALSO, THAT WAS THE DAY, I MADE THE DECISION THAT NEVER AGAIN NO MATTER HOW ILL AND SICK I WAS AND AM WOULD I JUST ACCEPT WORDS LIKE THAT AND I BEGAN TO FIGHT FOR MY LIFE MORE THAN EVER FROM THEN ONTIL NOW. THE DOCTOR DID SAY SOME THINGS THAT DID TAKE PLACE. I CAN STILL REMEMBER HIM TELLING ME I WOULD HAVE SEVERE JOINT PAIN AND BONE PAIN FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE. MANY PEOPLE AT SOME POINT EXPERIENCE JOINT PAIN BUT I'M TELLING YOU, U DEFINATELY DO NOT WANT TO EXPERIENCE BONE PAIN. I KNOW PEOPLE WHO HAVE LITERALLY LOST THEIR MINDS FROM BONE PAIN AND FROM OTHER PAINS THAT I HAVE FROM DIFFERENT DISEASES. AS I GOT OLDER, NEW DISEASES WERE DISCOVERED. ONTIL THIS DAY, WE DONT KNOW WHY I HAVE CERTAIN THINGS. I HAVE MANY ALLERGIES TO MEDICATION AND TO THE NATURAL FOOD ITSELF. I RARELY EAT BECAUSE I'M ALLERGIC TO ALMOST EVERYTHING. I CANT HAVE ANYTHING AT ALL THAT IS STRONG IN IRON. IF SOMETHING HAS A LITTLE IRON, I MAY BE ABLE TO EAT A LITTLE. I JUST HAVE TO MAKE SURE I HAVE MEDICATION ON HAND. IF I SHOULD HAVE KIDNEY BEANS OR PEANUTS, IN A COUPLE MINUTES I'M COMPLETELY DIZZY, HAVE EXCRUCIATING HEAD PAIN AND I BECOME UNCONSIOUS, SOMETIMES GOING INTO COMATOSE STATE. YESTERDAY WAS SPENT IN THE HOSPITAL. WHEN MY REGULAR GP SAW ME AND REALIZED I COULD BARELY LIFT MY HEAD, HIS HEART WENT OUT TO ME. I'M THE TYPE OF PATIENT THAT EVEN WHEN I'M DYING, I'M LAUGHING. SO WHEN I CAN BARELY SMILE, ITS LIKE THE DOCTORS CAN BARELY THINK. ITS JUST IN THE PAST FEW YEARS THAT I CANT KEEP SILENT ALWAYS WHEN IN PAIN. YESTERDAY, WHEN THE DOCTOR TOUCHED MY LEFT THIGH, I DOUBLED OVER IN PAIN AND CRIED OUT. THE WORSE THING AS I SAID ITS DIFFICULT TO HELP ME. FOR OVER 30 YEARS, I HAVE BEEN HAVING DAILY SEVERE HEADACHES. SOMETIMES THE HEADACHES TURN INTO MIGRAINES. I HAVE MIGRAINES WEEKLY. I ALSO HAVE MIGRAINES IN MY EYES. THAT MY FRIENDS WILL DRIVE U CRAZY. I HAVE GLAUCOMA. AS U KNOW GLAUCOMA IS A SILENT DISEASE. NO WARNINGS AND I HAD REGULAR EYE EXAMINATIONS. ITS A RARE DISEASE THAT LED ME TO FIND OUT ABOUT THE GLAUCOMA. THAT IS A STORY BY ITSELF. VERY TRAUMATIC. IF I DONT REMEMBER, PLS REMIND ME TO SHARE IT WITH YOU. SOME OF THE DISEASES AND HEALTH ISSUES I HAVE ARE : 1. DAILY HEADACHES, SOMETIMES MIGRAINES 2. ASHTMA 3. BRONCHITIS WITH COPD 4. OSTEOPOROSIS 5. OSTEOARTHRITIS 6. FIBROMYALGIA 7. SEVERE CHRONIC NERVE PAIN 8. SCOLIOSIS 9. TWISTED SPINE 10. RARE DISEASE CALLED CUSHINGS SYNDROME OR DISEASE 11. SICKLE CELL BETA THALLASEMIA 12. CANCER THERE ARE 2 RARE DISEASES ON THAT LIST THAT I WILL HAVE TO EXPLAIN TO U BECAUSE THEY ARE VERY RARE WITH NO CURES. THEY CAUSE EXCRUCIATING PAIN. ONE OF THEM DRASTICALLY CHANGES UR BODY. AS I'M HERE WRITING, I'M HAVING CHRONIC SEVERE JOINT PAIN. THERE ARE OTHER DISEASES/HEALTH ISSUES THAT I WILL TALK ABOUT NEXT TIME BECAUSE MORE THAN EVER YOU WILL REALIZE ITS ONLY SINCERE PRAYERS AND GOD'S MERCIES WHY I'M ALIVE. THIS IS VERY LONG WHAT I'VE WRITTEN AND I HAVE LOTS MORE TO SHARE SO I KNOW U WILL UNDERSTAND WHY I HAVE TO STOP HERE. ITS ALOT TO TAKE IN. IF I DIDNT HAVE A STRONG THRESHOLD FOR PAIN, I COULDNT EVEN WRITE. I'M ALWAYS WILLING TO SHARE IF SOMEONE IS INTERESTED SO PLS FEEL FREE TO ASK ME ANYTHING U DONT UNDERSTAND OR JUST WANT TO KNOW. I ASKED U TO REMIND ME OF THE STORY BEHIND THE GLAUCOMA BECAUSE I HAVE SEVERE SHORT TERM MEMORY DUE TO BRAIN TRAUMA SO I MAY FORGET AND ITS A VERY INTERESTING TRAUMATIC STORY. FOR NOW I WILL END BY SAYING : FRIENDS, WHATEVER UR GOING THRU, DONT GIVE UP. BELIEVE ME, I CAN PROBABLY RELATE TO SOMETHING UR GOING THRU. I'M VERY ILL BUT I HAVE TO PRAISE GOD DAILY BECAUSE HE KEEPS HELPING ME AND THRU OUT EVERYTHING, SOMETIMES EVEN WHEN IT SEEMS I'M BREATHING MY LAST BREATH, I KNOW GOD IS WITH ME. I'M HERE FOR YOU ALL. I PRAY FOR YOU AND YOU CAN TALK TO ME ANYTIME BECAUSE I TRULY DO CARE ABOUT YOUR LIVES AND I WANT YOU ALL TO BE OK OR EVEN REACH A PLACE WHERE U CAN MANAGE WHAT UR GOING THRU. TAKE CARE. GOD BLESS U ALL. HUGS FROM ARIA. REMEMBER TO SHARE THE GIFT OF A SMILE WITH SOMEONE.