An Ant Made The Difference. (Wrote April 1983)
Today I got really mad and stormed out of the house and yelled, "I quit, I give up, it's just not worth it." I went down to the rivers edge to get away and there I slammed myself down on the steps. I guess I was having a pity party and I wanted to swim around in it. Sometimes it seemed like no one really cared and today was one of those days where everyone and everything was working against me. I started crying and giving in to my private party.
As I sat there staring at some leaves floating by in the water, something caught my eye. I looked read hard and spotted this tiny ant that was moving across a log laying beside me. Here was this tiny ant caring a large piece of bread, or what looked like bread. That food he carried had to be at least three times or more bigger than he was. I suddenly forgot that I was upset as I sat there spellbound by this little guy. As I watched him I thought about his journey and how important it must be to get that food home. Every bump on that log must have seemed like a mountain and each grove a valley. Yet, he didn't give up even though his food dropped a lot and he would go around in circles, he keep trudging on.
While watching him, I thought of how quickly we give up over little things and thought do I even know what a "heavy load" is. I wondered how hard it would really be to walk in this little guys footsteps. I fought the urge to pick him up and move him down to the end of the log just to shorten his journey some. But something told me that if I did, it would only cause him more trouble in the long run. I thought if only I knew where he was going I would just put him there. Then I remembered how many times I got into trouble because I wanted to do things my way. I somehow knew it was important for this tiny creature to do it all on his own. After all, he knew where he was going and I had no clue. After watching him for awhile I knew he wasn't going to quit, he wasn't going to give up no matter how hard and how long the journey.
Just then a thought crossed my mind, what if some big foot came along and ended it all for him. I thought of all the things that could go wrong for him on his journey home. Then it happened, he ran into trouble...it started to rain. He was having difficulty walking and the morsel he carried became wet and that increased it's weight. Even though he fought hard, the rain won, it washed the food away and all of it was for nothing and believe it or not I cried. Yet something told me that when the rain stopped, he would be right back there looking for more food. His mission was to bring the food home and he wouldn't return without it. I wondered if by chance his load was more important to him than how heavy it was. At that moment I thought God was talking to me. I got up and decided to get out of the rain, go up to the house and give out some hugs and apologys. That little ant served it's purpose today and also made a big difference in my life. When things like this happen I know God loves me and is looking out for me and He will go out of His way to show his love for me even through a tiny ant if need be. I try hard not to let those "little things" go un-noticed. I gave out the hugs and the I'm sorry's and I was forgiven. All I can say is "Thank You Lord."
I also try not to step on any ants. Claire
