Title: Life Lessons
Tags: Mother, Humor
Blog Entry: My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE . "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning." My mother taught me RELIGION . "You better pray that will come out of the carpet." My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL . "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week! My mother taught me LOGIC . "Because I said so, that's why." My mother taught me MORE LOGIC . "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me." My mother taught me FORESIGHT . Make sure you wear clean underware, in case you're in an accident." My mother taught me IRONY "Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about." My mother taught me about science of OSMOSIS . "Shut your mouth and eat your supper." My mother taught me about CONTORTIONIST . "Will you look at the that dirt on the back of your neck!" My mother taught me about STAMINA . "You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone. My mother taught me FAMOUS QUOTES . "You know the rule when we go shopping. Together we stand, divided we get whooped." My mother taught me the importance of REPETITION . "How many times do I have to tell you that just because everyone else is doing it; you do not have to.
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