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Negative or Positive - You Must Decide
Posted On 02/22/2013 03:09:31 by Canuck_58

Last week I noticed that I was receiving more than a few notifications that a number of people had visited my Noth page and realized I had been chosen as a Featured Member.  I received so many congratulations which are more deserved by the artist who designed my particular background than myself.

My friends here know that I haven’t been nearly as active at Noth for the last almost two years as I once was since that tragic event in my life, the loss of my dear husband.  It was the 10th of April 2011 that he left me to continue on my own.  This loss has created what I describe as a big hole in my life which I am still having trouble trying to fill.  This is as a result of having been quite dependent on someone who thought his main purpose in life was doing things and caring for others.

Earlier this morning I was thinking, it’s the start of another day which I have to get through, the hours will pass and it will be afternoon and then evening and once again time to lay my head down for another night’s rest.  And so on it goes.  It’s not a very positive way to think I am sure you will agree but wait a moment.   

Outside the sun is shining which is naturally a very positive thing and as I often have to do, I decided that I will make something positive of this day.  I’ve already been outside walking the little doggy I am looking after for a friend.  Later I will go to my neighbor’s to pick up her shopping list as she cannot get out to do it herself.  Who knows what will happen or who I will cross paths with today.  One thing I do know is that one always has to be open to these events or encounters.  I could go out with a frown on my face but I think will try smiling for myself but also  to see if I can brighten up someone else’s day, if only just a bit.

Oh and to everyone who sent me congrats, I thank you.

Have a nice day, evening or whatever.


 



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Viewing 1 - 5 out of 5 Comments

02/23/2013 03:05:35

I do not know you personally, but I understand how you are feeling as I lost my hubby four years ago on 4th March.  Oppsgal is right, nothing will be the same again, you, Barb and I know that. It is not an easy situation, but little by little we manage to get stronger and find joy in the day, hard as that might be at times.  You have already made great leaps and bounds reaching out and helping people....good for you.  Emotions can be a bit of a seesaw for awhile and there is no right or wrong way to grieve...my mum died in Nov...she WAS 96, but even so,it was one less loved one, and another time for grieving and sometimes the days just drag by.

My prayers and thoughts are with you for you to continue to gain strength, to grow and to find peace.



02/22/2013 21:05:53

Hello, I do not know  you personally but I extend to you my hand in friendship and sisterly love.  The loss of someone who has been the heartbeat of our life i believe is something no one ever gets over nor does it get any easier.  This hurt when ever you touch upon it will hurt just as much as when it was first there.  it also isn't anything you will just snap out of, and don't let anyone say you should not feel this way,  but I can say there are many people here to help you.


Having said this I do want to say a few more words.  Nothing will ever be the same, but you can and will be able to live a good and healthy life but it will be a different life.


It seems you are on the right path for you. as you are reaching out to others, and at first it just may be a way to fill some of those empty hours.   Right now you are begining to deal with a discouraging pattern you have developed in your life.  Which is just waiting for that clock to tick by until its time for bed where you can sleep and while sleeping you are not feeling your grief. But you are taking big big steps now to rebuild your life.  I am sure your Husband would be very proud of you. !!! doing this little exer csie each morning may help you a bit.  Close your eyes and picture in your mind a country road of a seaside beach to walk upon, and see yourself taking steps to approch a small building off in the distance.  and each day take one more step.  and then open  your eyes and go about your day as if you were walking that road or beach or whatever.  You are getting closer and closer everyday.. but it begins with just one step. 


there are people here who care.. just ask us.  my friend.   



02/22/2013 10:19:37

That's my girl!



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02/22/2013 09:09:51

I know what you're talking about, Jeanne. I have felt the same way since my son died January 10, 2011. I just can't seem to "connect" anywhere, even though, I try. There's just something about me that isn't there anymore.


Each day I try anew but it ends the same. I even deleted my account on a social network I'd been with almost since it's beginning. I can't seem the get into the swing of things.


I used to do a lot of Blogging over there. We were not as restricted as we are here and i write write about anything. I ended up just doing "copy & paste" like everyone else. That's not Blogging so I cancelled.


Although I have accepted that my son is no longer on earth there's still something bogging me down. My husband does his very best to help keep me going and to others I may seem just fine but I'm not.


I'll continue to pray for you and myself so we can finally get on with it. Take care. Sending love you way.



02/22/2013 08:04:28

So sorry for your loss. I have not been through that yet so I can't imagine. You seem to be taking a positive attitude though and hope all goes well for you.





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