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Being a Solo Mother
Posted On 11/15/2020 01:31:30 by kiwibarb

Controlling teenagers in the 1960-1970 years was somewhat different than anything my parents had to put up with. Being a solo mother sure had its moments. I had four daughters, and all four in one way or another contrived to put me in embarrassing situations. I hasten to add, before “telling” on them, that they have all more than made up for it in later life.

Here are a few snippets of the kind of things they threw at me.

Daughter #1

Not sure if she was 14 or 15 at the time, but she had the brilliant idea of going to Tauranga with one of her girlfriends. Tauranga is a town 182km from our home, it took 2½ hours to drive there, and the route included two scary gorges. The day chosen for this foray happened to be at Labour Weekend. I have always kept off the roads at any long weekend, there’s enough ignorant drivers to make it wiser not to venture forth. However, when I got a phone call from the Tauranga Police Station telling me they had my daughter and another girl called Vivian, and they thought I should come and get them, I wanted to know what they had done. “They haven’t actually done anything, we just didn’t think they should be hanging around in the park with some boys”.

Well, long weekend or not, I was going to fetch them home, and I took my twins and Vivian’s mother as well. All the way there, Vivian’s mother was moaning “How could Vivian DO this to me!” When we got there, we were told that had we not shown care enough to come and get our girls, they would have been put in a Girls’ Home pending court action. OH, NICE! All the way home Vivian’s mother was moaning “Vivian, how could you DO this to me!” And she didn’t even offer to share the cost of the petrol.

Daughter #2

There’s a fair range of situations this one caused, but the one that amused me the most was the dental nurse. My former husband was always helpful when any of the girls had to be disciplined, and this was one occasion when he came in handy. I got a phone call from the school dental nurse. “I’ve got your daughter in  here, and she’s already bitten me twice!” Well her father could deal with that, wasn’t he GOOD with women? I have no idea how he pacified that nurse and don’t care, but I didn’t hear any more about it.

Daughters #3 and #4 (twins)

I got a phone call that my brats had been throwing stones at a lady’s house up the road, and a window had been broken. (Makes me wonder why I bothered having a phone at all!) So I asked the question, and of course it wasn’t them, it was Wendy who threw the stone that broke the window. 

“Were you two throwing stones too?” “It wasn’t us, it was Wendy.” “Look at me! Were you, or were you not, throwing stones?” “Well we did throw one, but it was Wendy…” Enough said. “I’m taking you to Mrs O’Connor’s and you will apologise”. Well they didn’t like that. Neither did I like having to pay for the window, but I did it right then and there, then went to see Wendy’s mother. “My child wouldn’t do that!” she said. I don’t argue with people who think their kids are perfect, it doesn’t change their minds, and I don’t care who threw the actual stone that broke the window. If my kids were in any way involved, I paid.

There are times when I wondered what onearth possessed me to have four kids, but in later life I have reason to be thankful I did. Love my kids to bits. And they’re not kids any more, they are mothers and grandmothers.

Tags: Kids' Shennegans


Viewing 1 - 3 out of 3 Comments

11/19/2020 01:04:53

Love this.  My mom was a single mom too. Each of us 4 kids cause her some embarrassing moments.  I remember I was either 9 or 10 when the neighbors who wer disliked by the block.  Anyway, they had a daughter about my age who was the youngest member inher family and spoiled rotten. Well, kids will be kids and because we were teasing the kid, her mom called the cops. Well, the cops came and were talking to mom outside. Her back was to the door and the cop facing the door. Mom was tellingthe cop that she didn't encourage  that type of behavior and besides that "Judy is extremely mature for her age. As mom was talking, she noticed the cop staring at the door. The door had a small window. Mom turned around but didn't see anything so continue talking. All the time she was talking the cop was looking at the door and trying to hide a grin. Mom whirled around and caught me making faces. I dunked but she caught me.  I was stuck in my room for a week.  When you are a kid, a week is a year.  LOL

11/18/2020 23:17:48

I sure can identify with you... some of the stuff that our kids were up to were "hair-raising", funny, and sometimes embarrasing. But low and behold, they are responsible adults, now dealing with their own teenages and young adults. What goes around, comes around! It is all worth it!

11/17/2020 21:48:16

I can understand both sides of these situations.  They grew up to be productive adults because of you and inspite of you.  The Love stays with you no matter what they do.  Thank you for sharing.

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