I turn 59 next month😦Where has the time gone? My latest blog was about this proverbial subject. (Posted here on the Blog) We live life moving forward, but understand it looking back. I have a tendency to look back at my life in increments or sections (periods of time), mainly work careers, broken up with those years of not working..which is where I currently reside. I'm grateful for each and every day that taps me on the shoulder. Many grow older, some never do. I know too many of the latter. One of them died 25 years ago (yesterday) at the very young age of 33. Another friend left this earth too soon as well 16 years ago (As of April 15). She was 34, leaving a 13 yr old daughter behind..On the flip side, my sweet neighbor- Marie, she recently celebrated her 91st birthday. She is like my second Mom. I'm truly grateful for her presence in my life..26 years coming up this December. 

Thanks Beth for opening this subject up. 🙂

Aging is inevitable, but to grow old gracefully is a choice. While we know that getting old is unavoidable, how we perceive this natural process depends greatly upon our social and cultural influences. In western culture, we tend to idolize youth, while aging is stigmatized as undesirable, even shameful. We worry about what we will look like, how our bodies will function, how our minds will deteriorate and how or where we will die. In many ways as we get older we become less visible; in popular culture, in employment, in our communities, even in our own families and this can have a greater impact on women than men. We risk becoming isolated and depressed, instead of experiencing old age as a celebration; of our achievements and of knowledge accumulated over a lifetime.

In many cultures, aging is revered, and if we look to the ways the elderly are perceived and cared for by these societies, we may discover ways to grow old gracefully ourselves. Instead of focusing on the physical and mental deterioration that growing old inevitably brings, these cultures look deeper into what it means to have lived a long life. It begins with how language is used and instead of placing a negative connotation on the word ‘old’ it instead becomes a term of endearment; even implying being closer to divinity. Getting older is also seen as a resource. Knowledge and experience are revered. Aging is associated with wisdom that needs to be passed down to younger generations. In this way, the elderly are respected and become desirable instead of a burden. They are cared for by their families or the greater community in a different way. They aren’t just hidden away in nursing homes and hospitals. Often children will care for their parents or grandparents and the community is accessible to the elderly. They are visible in public spaces and are catered to and included through accessible services. In some cultures, the hierarchy of age is observed closely and to be an elder in a family or community is something that is given authority and admiration. The cultures that value aging the most are those that reflect on their own mortality. Death is not a taboo; it is discussed openly and rather than being feared or ignored, it is seen as an opportunity to contemplate and reaffirm life.

Sometimes it is easier to think about the things we shouldn't do in order to delay aging. The aim is to focus on self preservation by avoiding things rather than embracing the predictability of getting old. Perhaps this is the difference between sliding down the bumpy road of old age, by clinging desperately to our youth instead of accepting the inevitable and facing it head on with enthusiasm and willingness. The choice to grow old gracefully doesn’t have to feel like giving up or ‘letting ourselves go’. It should feel like surrendering in a positive way to the twilight of our lives by reflecting on the years gone, living fully and mindfully in the present and looking forward to the future, however short it may be.