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BLOCK PARTY FROM HELL
Posted On: 09/19/2020 12:59:53


I was STARVING !!! This was absolutely the last block party I was going to attend at a former co-worker and friend of my wife in Hackensack, New Jersey last summer.

. Now we're invited to an end of summer block party next weekend. . I could spend two hours in traffic getting there from our Long Island home. Great.!! Just what I want to do on my day off is sit in traffic and then sit with a bunch of zombies I have no interest in being with. I told my wife that I'm only going if I can bring food and liquor.

Okay-my wife's friend cater to her elderly Jewish parents. I can respect that. They're Kosher-on restricted diets-no problem-but this year put out some other food besides rotten deviled eggs ,cheeses, and salads. I want real food-something I can sink my teeth into. Give me steak, chicken, beef, pork, corned beef-isn't that Kosher enough? My choices shouldn't be limited to baby carrots ,cherry tomatoes, celery, lettuce, and several varieties of unsalted nuts. What am I? a squirrel?

Every other family and friends on the block had platters of cold cuts: humongous heroes filled with sausages, meatballs, turkey, roast beef and veal- even dishes filled with lobster and shrimp. There were grills with hamburgers and hotdogs ,barbecued chicken, and ribs. Beer was flowing out of bottles on every table...except ours !!!

We had borscht,(yucch) and diluted lemonade and iced tea for the little brats that were exploding water balloons all over the table and eating cotton candy from one of the free stands. Hey?? How about a nice porterhouse steak for our table?

Anyway, I told my wife either to get new friends who live on our side of the George Washington Bridge or else I'm bringing some fried chicken and a sausage parmesan hero that I can heat up in her friend's microwave ...for me. AND a 6 pack of Heineken Premium Light . . If my wife hadn't brought Dunkin Donuts and mesquite BBQ potato chips last year, I would have certainly starved.

I'm not going there to stare at low sodium ziti with no sauce and some shrubbery with dressing I'm supposed to think is food. I'm in no way being disrespectful to the elderly Jewish couple but this is not a Passover meal and I'm not Bugs Bunny.!!



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Viewing 1 - 4 out of 4 Comments

01/13/2021 20:04:54

loved your blog. keep 'em coming.



09/21/2020 17:47:48

We use to have neighborhood block parties here too. Twenty five years later, the neighborhood is not the same..older folks have died off or moved, and we are diminishing as what we once knew. The leader of our pack..she passed in 2012..thus the celebrations ended. I'm with you..rabbit food does not stick to the ribs or stomach.



09/20/2020 05:13:51

not a good day for you. More liquor.



09/19/2020 17:43:41

Loved the blog.  I too enjoy real food.  I have cut down on salt but I still love a piece of chicken.  I want meat and potatoes.  How do you think I got to be so old?




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