So I'm checking out at Walmart with a huge bag of dog food and this nosy lady behind me asked if I had a dog??! 😳 Like seriously? duh, I'm buying dog food!!! So I said "no ma'am, I don't. I'm starting the dog food diet again. I probably shouldn't because I ended up in the hospital last time, but I lost 20+ pounds! woke up in intensive care with a tube coming out of ‘you don't want to know where’, and an IV in my arm. But anyway, It's a rapid weight loss diet. All you do is load your pockets with food nuggets and eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well, so I’m going to try it again." (I should add that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.) Horrified, this chick asked if I ended up in ICU because the dog food poisoned me. I told her, "no, I stepped off a curb to sniff a poodle's butt and a car hit me." I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard.
Now that you've read this I have to confess, I copied it. Now you can copy and share. Make someone else laugh.
Tags: Life
