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I HAVE A QUESTION ... WHY ARE YOU ON NOTH?
Posted On 01/31/2014 00:51:18 by yourchoice

During the last two week, when I have been dealing with a minor health issue (but staying home out of the cold weather), I’ve had time to myself, without interruptions. I never allow myself to be bored; there is ALWAYS something to do. My voice was hardly above a whisper so chatting on the telephone would have been annoying to my friends. My husband was enjoying the relative silence … he didn’t need to wander out to his shop to escape my continuous chatter (I do take the occasional respite to catch my breath … honest!).

What I did do was spend quite a bit of time on The Hill, trying to catch up on long-time friends, meet some people who I only knew by their username, and introduce myself to some new people that I had not yet crossed paths with in my ‘wanderings’. I visited pages of people who were active, but their list of friends was very short; others who had been members for a much longer time and had hundreds of people in their List of Friends. I checked to see who was having a birthday this month, and stopped by to give them my good wishes, and I checked to see if I could welcome someone who had just arrived to our cyber community. What I saw created questions in my mind: Why so few friends? How does a person develop a friendship with hundreds of people, or are they competing with someone to have the longest list? Why do some say that they aren’t accepting new friends, and some people have their pages blocked, visible only to those who are friends. I couldn’t leave a ‘Happy Birthday note, perhaps meet someone who had similar interests to me, or just leave a friendly note to offer some help if they had any questions. I wondered why they were here or what happened that they felt they had to hide behind a “locked” page.

In times past, I have talked to people who only wanted to be friends with those they knew from another Social Network Site; I have heard of some who hide so that they don’t have to listen to anyone else’s opinion; and I have helped people who blocked their page because they didn’t know how else to stop harassment from another person. This community is intended to be a friendly community, and has tried to give guidelines to maintain the integrity of the site, but also give latitude to creativity. Why are there people here who want to run the site to THEIR liking, even though they have no ownership. Why is it so hard to comply with the guidelines?

Years ago (and I’m amazed to remember how many years), we had Pen Pals in school, arranged by our teacher who found kids our age in a far away country, to whom we could write letters, send photographs, and learn about their home and country. Many, many of those pen pals became very close friends, even though we would not likely ever meet them in person. For me, that is what NOTH has become. I have developed friendships with people in a variety of countries, whom I will never meet. Our friendship would not have had a chance to begin if my page would have been blocked. And, if there is a difference of opinion, talk it out! We’re all different, and this world would be a boring place if we were all the same.

I hope to hear from you ... why are you here? I hope it is to meet new friends, and not because you want to show others about how smart you are, and how independant you want to be. Those attitudes get old real fast! Try this ... ask someone you just met to tell you one interesting experience in their life that I wouldn't have read about. It can be the start of an interesting conversation.

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Viewing 1 - 9 out of 9 Comments

02/01/2014 06:02:26


IAMRCx wrote:

I came here to meet new people, to expand the internet experience. I do not wish to stay only on one site...I tend to feel like I'm in a rut after a while. Seems like each site has it's own mannerisms, for lack of a better term coming to mind. I came to learn what others have to share and to give of myself what I have.  In the process, I seem to have stepped on a few toes....I will be the first to admit...I am different. I suppose it take a different kind of person to want to be my friend here. ....but that is my reason for joining this site.

I' m glad you joined in this conversation ... It seems that we are a couple of "night-crawlers"! You mention that you are different ... Aren't we all?! That's what makes these life experiences so interesting. I think I've mentioned sometime along the way that I am a 'word' person ... But I must admit that I'm a different kind of word person ... I talk a lot, and I type quickly!!! I've never been able to get my head around poetry, and I guess that I've stopped trying. I know that there are Groups here on The Hill specifically for poets and "would-be" poets who share their love of the craft, but I haven't even stopped by. I'm a "people" person and I head to The Hill as often as time permits, just to see what's going on.. Unfortunately, the duties of living have a way of interrupting the fun times on my computer.



01/31/2014 20:40:14


NightOwl2 wrote:


I always have a nice time here on NOTH. I do like my nice friends. In the end if its nice I like it! This is a nice place. 



I'm so happy that you contributed to this discussion ... it's nice to meet a person who is happy to be part of this community.



01/31/2014 20:32:55

Like yourself I joined NOTH to make "friends", albeit the virtual kind, pen pals of the new world. I used to have lots and lots (hundreds) of "friends" on this site but I also found that a lot of those so called "friends" were just in it to collect numbers. Maybe it looks good to have 750+ friends but if you never hear from them then what's the point? Competion? Maybe. I'm not really sure but it wasn't for me. I really don't care about the numbers. I care about finding people I have something in common with. Someone to have a virtual cup of coffee with in the morning or check in with once a week. See how they're doing and what's happening in their lives (if they want to share).


Little by little I've whittled down my list to just those few I hear from. Some I hear from on a daily basis, some just occasionally and I still have some I never hear from at all. Like you I also question at time what the point is. I have also lost "friends" who decided that the almight Facebook was for them. At first they were trying to do both and then when it all got too much they left NOTH in favor of FB. I don't FB at all. It's a personal choice and FB is not for me. Too impersonal and way too much personal information out there for someone to come along and steal.


Recently I tried keeping up with birthdays and featured members but I found some "locked" doors, or blocked sites and eventually I lost momentum. I wrote a blog about this some time ago. One of the members answered that blog with the fact that they'd been the subject of harrassment and had therefore blocked their page from comments/viewing for that reason. That was just one though. I can certainly understand that. I also heard from people who only wanted to hear from others who had been on another similar social media site which had closed down. They only wanted to communicate with those who had migrated from that site. OK to each his own.


Sometimes I also laugh when I see people stating on their profile that they're 102 years old. Come on....we all know this site is for us of the more mature vintage. I have no problem with anyone knowing how old I am. In fact I'm proud I got to be this old when I think of all the stunts I've pulled in my life!!!


Your blog really hit home to me. I've been in the situation you've been in. Dealing with health issues and finding that NOTH becomes a bit of a life line. A way to communicate with others. This is the only site that I know of that has a small community of people who have scrambled, strolled or dragged themselves up and maybe "over the Hill".  A site that offered the ability to personalize your own page. Learn some computer design if you want to. Members who are knowledgeable and will help you with that if you're interested. Where else are you going to find that?


Some of us have been here for a long time. I think I joined not long after it was launched. It was much busier then. Friendlier and more social. I've hated seeing this site slow down to a crawl. Some of us die hards will hang on. I hope so because it's the best site for friendliness that I've come across (in most cases).....As for opinions.....well you know what they say about those. We're all different so I try to be flexible (difficult when you get older). If I don't like what I see or read I ignore it and go on. Life's too short to get all tangled up in that mess.


So that's my two bits worth




01/31/2014 20:30:57


winterdog wrote:


... My interesting experience was a typhoon in 1970 in the Phillipines, also an earthquake the same year. I was scared and lucky I am still alive.



Thanks for participating in this discussion ... for the most part, we live in a very boring area, in regards to weather. I've only seen pictures of the results of typhoons and earthquakes. The most drama we've had in our area recently is the floods of June 2013, and the occasional severe ice storm. I think I'll stay where I am.



01/31/2014 14:03:32


Jane wrote:


Everyone reaches out in a different mannor and perhaps for a different reason. Just knowing all of you are here, gives me comfort of not being "alone" in this world. Reading of the experiences you have had, results in my remembering an experience. It matters not where people are from, it is communication. How each  person responds, is original to him/her. I am grateful for the opportunity to hear from and read blogs, etc.  on Not Over the Hill. It takes a person "outside"of their home and into the world.





Jane, thank you for your thoughts ... I have read so many times from people who are limited in their mobility, etc. who refer to the Internet as their "window on the world"! NotOverTheHill is like a virtual international community, with all kinds of people with all kinds of interests, that we can relate to or ignore. I am reminded of a quote from Dr. Laura ... "You don't need to like everyone, but you need to be courteous!" (... or something like that!)



01/31/2014 13:31:17


greenputter wrote:


............. It has been a fun ride and a very learning experience .............. The world is not as big as I thought .............



Don, you are so right ... and as for learning, there are so many people here on the Hill who have 'knowledge' to share. Often, that is very different from 'opinions'!



01/31/2014 13:22:32


waltaylor wrote:



Oh my goodness, 'waltaylor', you must have stayed up all night to create your reply to my Blog. Lots of good reasons for being here ... and thanks for participating.


Mona



01/31/2014 06:59:46

.......... You make a good point , people will be people ........... Thank goodness we are all not the same ........... I dont like buying a pig in a poke as we say down south ........ I show alittle background on my page so people can know something about me ............. I have learned alot , if you know nothing , you have got to learn something about computers .........

............. It has been a fun ride and a very learning experience .............. The world is not as big as I thought .............

...................... Have a goodun ........... HUGS ............ Don .............



01/31/2014 04:47:51






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